Monday, June 19, 2006

SunJune18 Boardom...

Apologies for the lack of updatery, folks. It's just I've been waging my own private war with the cretins of Yes, yes: I ought to ignore the ill-thought-out ramblings of nerds holed up in their mam's darkened front rooms. I ought to be the better man, turn the other cheek, get a life. I am the one with the job, after all. But here we go.

It's not that people calling me a cnut particularly bothers me. Believe it or not, I'm quite used to that at this stage. No, it was the idiocy of the people charged with keeping things clean - the moderators - that bothered me. Yes, I'm rising to it, but it's got me up on the soap-box now, so I'll go on.

Basically, a girl listener visited boards to tell them about the show - in the name of the feature we used to have "Don't tell a friend - tell EVERYONE!". It was a kind, pleasant gesture from a well-meaning listener. Shortly after her post, a moderator - someone who works for boards to keep an eye on things and make sure no-one takes the piss - someone who MODERATES - basically wrote that loads of people hate the show and should feel free to slag it and me off. I got in touch with this "moderator", this Gavin, aka Monkeyfudge, (whom, for the purposes of this article, we shall call Gavinfudge) and politely and privately pointed out to him that his post was a bit one-sided and might just encourage people to be nasty. In simple terms, I told him he wasn't being very moderate.

Gavinfudge didn't agree. He told me he's a wannabe radio presenter with very little talent and as embittered as he is, he himself doesn't like the show, so he felt he should start a thing slagging me off. No, I'm kidding. That's not true. He replied, saying he "thought" his remarks were not one-sided, and he said he'd stop things if people were just nasty. Fair enough, so I let it go. I checked in a few days later, and things started to get stupid, as a free-for-all slagging me had kicked off.

As I explained to him, it wasn't the slagging that pissed me off. That I'm used to: it was that HE - the MODERATOR - was the one who started it. So I (again, privately) got back to him and told him he wasn't doing a very good job keeping things civilised, as the thread got more and more pathetic. He said I should go above his head and complain. I told him I wasn't going to do that but he should have been more thoughtful about his actions, told him I was done with him and boards, and asked to have my account deleted from boards. He then went and started slagging me off himself!

My account has been disabled by another "moderator", so-called "Talliesin", on the grounds that I was spamming them - that I was posting the same thing hundreds of times. I think I've posted like, 20 messages on it ever - GavinFudge has written nearly 7,000. Talliesin, over 4,000. So I wanted to voice my objection to being called a spammer, but of course, now I'm blocked, there's no right-to-reply with these keyboard nazi's so I'm here to set the record straight.

As I've already said, I do know I ought to be the bigger, better person, but from listening to the show, I'm sure you know we don't do big, and we certainly don't do better. So that's my side of the story. I must say I thought the name came from the messageboards it's based on. As it turns out, you need to be as thick as two short planks to work for them.